The Gentle Shift

A simple fast that changed everything

I didn’t know there was any other direction for my family than the one we were on. God was about to change that!

I couldn’t wait for my kids to go to school!

It wasn’t that I didn’t love those little rapscallions. I considered them to be the cutest, smartest, funniest, and most adorable creatures on earth. But I was a busy pastor's wife, keeping up with the demands of our church plant in a small town. Our doors were open to anyone in need of encouragement, prayer, or a friend. My phone jangled incessantly.

I longed to lounge by the lake, take a stroll through the woods, or complete a full thought without it being broken midway by the familiar sound of a child yelling from upstairs: “Mom!”

A Simple Sacrifice

Even with time stretched thin as taffy, I knew my five children needed Mom’s attention as much as our small congregation. What could I do for them?

As a church, we fasted every Thursday and held a prayer meeting that focused on the growing ministry. A fast didn’t take extra time. Perhaps, I reasoned, I could add another day of fasting, specifically for my children?

I couldn't imagine going two full days a week without food, so I chose to add a half-day fast. No breakfast, no lunch, and not a nibble before 3 pm. Nothing too difficult. A minor sacrifice. I remember wondering whether my weak little half-day fast would move the heart of God, but it was all I had to give.

I was faithful for a full year. I did nothing extra other than this: whenever my stomach rumbled with hunger, I would look up and tell the Lord: "That’s for my kids."

The Afternoon at the Lake

One September day, a year into this prayer commitment, I gathered my kids and drove to a larger city. In less than a week, the oldest three would be attending class at our local school, and maybe, finally, I could put my feet up, sip some tea, and read a good book.

We shopped for school supplies before enjoying a last swim in the bay.

I can still see it vividly. I stood on the shore watching them laugh and splash, as a strange melancholy feeling washed over me.

I didn't want them to go back to school.

It was already challenging enough to carve out time to play and talk with my youngsters when our evenings were stuffed to the brim with Bible studies and events. Now, they were headed back to school and would be gone all day. Instead of relief, I felt a sense of loss.

Something unexpected stirred within me.

A Heart That Had Quietly Changed

After looking forward to the day the kids went back to school, when the noise of childish behavior would no longer interrupt my mind, and I could take a walk without having to referee squabbles over a Beanie Baby, my heart was strangely longing for more of the chaos, clutter, and involvement in their lives.

What was going on?

I believe the gentle mist of the Holy Spirit had been softening my heart on those half-day fasts. His answer was to do a subtle work in my soul, one I had not perceived happening. He had changed me.

As a teenager in the 1970’s, I had been a “women’s lib” advocate. I remember refusing to take Home Economics or learn to type because I scowled at being pigeonholed into “woman’s work.” Nope, I would have an “important” career!

Then God gave me a heart for motherhood that superseded the priorities I once held dear. I began to see another way forward, one I had not previously considered. I didn’t think that there might be other paths I could use to guide my brood into adulthood, but God knew.

This is the thing about fasting: You lay something before the Lord, and you expect Him to work on the situation. What you do not always expect is for Him to work on you.

The New Road

The oldest three went to school that year, but I began looking into something that was still fairly new and controversial at the time: homeschooling.

The following year, I didn't have to say goodbye to my kids as they marched off to school. I had done my research and was ready. I kept them home and began teaching them myself.

The years between their childhood and their adulthood today have been both blessed and a mess. But I believe the Lord led me to homeschool because in the messy times, their hearts were kept steadfast. I could pour love and truth into their growing minds in a way that would not have been possible otherwise. We made many memories learning and playing together.

Homeschooling was an answer for me, but this story is not meant to advocate for Homeschooling. I understand that education is an important and complex decision for all families.

Rather, this story is meant to advocate for fasting. It is a powerful prayer all in itself.
It is a tool in our spiritual tool belt that we can pull out and use with effective results. God has many ways to give us direction, and fasting is one of them. It is a way of laying a person before the Lord and saying, "Have your own way," then stepping back and letting God do the work in them.

And more so, in you.

You do not need a dramatic, elaborate fast. You do not need to have it all figured out. A modest, consistent act of sacrifice offered faithfully over time is enough. The half-day fast turned out to be one of the most transformative things I have ever done, not because of what I gave up, but because of what God gently gave back.

Keep this in Mind:

• Fasting does not have to be dramatic or extreme to be meaningful. Even a modest, consistent sacrifice can move things in ways you cannot see.

• God often does His deepest work beneath the surface, long before you notice any change.

• Fasting is a way of laying a person or situation before God and saying, “Have your own way.”

• Prayer and fasting can reshape your own desires just as much as they shape circumstances around you.

• Let God, not society, dictate the path of your family.

I pray for your family today:

May God direct your path in the care, feeding, and raising of your young ones. May He guide your prayers and soften your heart to the changes that may be necessary or helpful.

Lord, we surrender our ways into your hands and say, “Have YOUR way.”

Amen